Wow. TWO blog posts in a month? Whatever could be going on??
I feel as if I’ve dropped off the writing map, and I guess that’s because I have. You might remember the sig in my email that reads “And if I go cold, I won’t get sold, I’ll get put in the back on the discount rack like another can of beans…”(B. Joel) Well, that’s where I feel as if I am. No longer really relevant when it comes to being an author.
Anyway, as you know from the last blog post, I’d had enough with the shit hole I worked in and started looking for a new job. But, because my life is never, EVER simple, a new wrinkle was tossed at me. Two, actually.
One: The plant I work at is closing and getting rid of EVERYONE.
Now this isn’t as much of a blow to me as it would have been had I not started getting my shit together already, but it still tosses a rather large element of urgency into the mix. In typical corporate fashion, they’ve told us notices will be going out starting sometime in the new year, but, of course, not exactly when. Hey, at least we get sixty days notice.
But of course, the story doesn’t end there, because as I said, things are never simple.
When I get laid off, I will be getting severance pay — except that the state that I live in immediately steals it from me.
Let me say that again: The state I live in steals my severance pay.
How you ask? Like this:
Our lovely Republican governor and his happy band of asshole republican cronies (I will NEVER, EVER vote for a republican again!) changed the rules of the state so that people like me — older people, who’ve worked for YEARS to build up any kind of severance (while STILL paying into the unemployment fund!), and who need that money to maintain mortgages and heath care — don’t get to use our severance. Instead, what happens is that the state decides that it will take the pittance it allows you per week (say… 400 dollars), will be divided into your severance, then won’t pay you a red cent until ALL of your severance is gone at the rate that they think you should spend it! This means that the money I needed to maintain my healthcare and my house is now effectively GONE. And before you even THINK of telling me “Oh but your severance is a benefit and not everyone gets that” let me respond with “Oh, but there are people with twenty thousand dollars in the bank, and maybe they should have to live off that the same way until it’s all gone before THEY get unemployment” because it’s the same fucking thing.
So maybe (if you’ve gotten this far), you’re wondering if that was the second wrinkle. No, of course not. That was just a side trip on the first one. Here’s the second one:
I’ve developed a new health problem — right about the time when I will be losing my insurance. And it’s one of those things that could be nothing, or it could be life threatening.
At least while I have the insurance, my doctors are being very helpful and I should soon know if it’s the nothing or the something. I’m hoping for the nothing, of course.
So anyway, if you’re even the least bit curious why I haven’t been around, even on twitter, now you know. I don’t want to post a continual stream of negative comments on twitter, I want to talk about sex and my writing. But I’m not really writing at all and I’m STILL relearning the tech (when you go in as a junior person, they don’t expect you know much, but when you’re a senior person well… that’s a very different story!), and will be until I find a new position. No matter that I know there are many other people out there that are worse off than me, the fact is there are ALWAYS people out there worse of than someone, and that doesn’t make me feel any better about my own situation.
Anyway, I know there are a few people who want to know if I’ll ever return to Avatar. All I can say is that it is my intention to do so. But my writing — especially free stuff — isn’t enough to live off of, so I really have to stay focused on keeping myself employed in a United States that has become a country that is By the Rich, For the Rich. So wish me your best, and keep Avatar in the back of your mind.